United with Dan on a Mission

3.1 From a seed to a snowball

I was wrapping up my 3rd year of university and wrestling with what to do afterwards. Having majored in both Sociology and Psychology, my options were numerous. My original plan was to continue studying towards either Honours in Sociology, or in Community Development, but lately I had been leaning more towards either Honours in Psychology, or PGCE (Post Graduate Certificate of Education) and possibly going into teaching. Either way, I also still wanted to do TESOL (Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages) to fulfil my dream of teaching English in Japan. It was probably my interest in TESOL that influenced my brother (Nathan) to do TESOL after high school, after his original plans to study animation had not worked out. He enrolled to study TESOL through the University on the Nations, as this was offered at the YWAM base in Worcester, meaning that he could study from home. I couldn’t help feeling slightly envious that he would achieve this (TESOL)dream of mine, before me; yet at the same time I felt super proud of the role I had played in instigating it. Little did I realise at the time, the significance of this door that had opened to him. TESOL was just the beginning, the stepping stone for him to go and do a DTS (Discipleship Training School) next. A DTS of all things! In my contextual situation, (very academic and career centred) Nathan’s plans seemed silly. Never the less, Nathan moved out to go stay on the YWAM base. Every now and then he would come home and tell us stories about his experiences. Personally, I thought these stories sounded delusional and farfetched. I was sceptical of everything he said, and troubled by it. If I did not know Nathan better, I would have thought he had got involved with some bizarre cult, or was on drugs or something.

As the family picked up on my attitude, they started making remarks like: “Nathan, you’re disturbing Daniel. To him you surely sound like ‘that person’.” A small part of me was happy for Nathan and the experiences he was having, if they were true; hoping it was, I tried to contribute where I could, and curtail my obvious scepticism… but often thought, rather him than me, I can’t do that, I am just way too sceptical, besides I wouldn’t spend my money on something like that. I’d rather study and further my career.

Looking back now I think it was fortunate that university was as busy as it was. It meant that I had to stay engaged with my work, rather than wrestle with the reality of Nathan’s experiences. A lot of thought and reasoning about them would have only made me more opposed to it. I was not ready to face those facts. I have heard people say that we can’t, but I still desperately struggled to, fit God into my logic box, saying things like: “How are we supposed to have a relationship with someone we can’t even understand?” Occasionally, Nathan would comment that he thought I should do a DTS too. He said that it would be good for me and would answer a lot of my questions and help my scepticism. But I simply wrote it off: ‘No ways!’ and didn’t think anything more about it, until one day somebody said something very essential! Somebody dropped a seed on a slope, it started to slide down taking some of the snow with it, and before long it turned into a mighty avalanche!

My dad overheard Nathan telling me that I should do a DTS too. Nathan had been sharing much of his experiences with him. Suddenly he turned to me and said: “I agree, doing a DTS would be really good for you! I have seen such a big change in Nathan’s life. All the wealth on this Earth cannot measure up to what he has gained. I will pay for you to do a DTS if it will help you decide to do one.” Hearing that induced a shell-shocked moment for me! I never thought I would ever hear him say something like that! He never says things like that! He just can’t, it’s not in his lexicon!

DTS led to ‘outreach’ and outreach led Nathan to Swaziland, and then on to Tanzania and Zanzibar. In the meantime, I finished my semester and life returned to ‘normal’ – no crazy brother around, ‘varsity holidays and more free time. Then one day my mother called me. Reluctantly leaving a game half-way through, I went to her. Because she had been missing Nathan, (or had been led by divine inspiration), she had started doing some research on YWAM bases around the world, and wanted to show me: “Do you realise you can do Ywam DTS at different places and different countries around the world?” I knew of the international aspect of Ywam, but if she was going to ‘insinuate’ that it was an option, I had better not miss out… I had never left the country before, and most of my schemes and study choices had been to empower me to do so. I didn’t want to get my hopes up since it would probably be wishful thinking, but she kept on: “Look here, you can do one in Australia, (too expensive) South Korea, (with the North and Trump… nope not anytime soon), India, (now why would I want to go there?), Brazil, (not interested). I sat along partly just for interest sake to see where all Ywam bases existed, but eventually I got bored and left. Then she called me back again, because she found some in Switzerland and Netherlands, even Japan. Tired of the scenario, I just said nope and turned to walk out, but then froze; turned back and asked smugly: “How about France?” (A curiosity and fascination of mine arising from family ancestry and the fact that the ‘Faure’ hails from France) “Yes” she said (my hopes went up), “but it would probably be mostly in French.” A little disappointed I thought to myself, “I knew learning French would be useful… I just haven’t had the chance yet, too bad.” Again I was about to leave when I turned to have one last swipe at the dangling DTS hook. I asked: “Well how about Scotland?”… And there it was! Ywam Scotland! After surfing for a while I came across the Seamill Centre in West Kilbride! “Uwah!! Look at that building! That’s SO COOL! I could spend a week just studying and admiring that architecture! I totally want to go there!!” Then I remembered what my Dad had said… but thought: “Well it’s highly unlikely that he will cover that! And with rand to pound conversion, it is really steep and … I would really love to go! But what’s the point… it’s not like we can afford it…”

At that point in time I wondered if it could be. I was very sceptical, but that sequence of events was no coincidence. The seed, sliding down the snowy slope had started growing into a snowball… Something about Seamill had etched itself into my consciousness in a way that I could just not shake it off. Could this really be where God is leading me….?

I began scheming: “How can I get there…?” I recalled some of Nathan’s stories about their group and finances, and how they prayed to God about funds. Surely something was wrong with me, but full of boldness, I told my mother: “I am going to Scotland!! I will apply, and pray that if I am accepted, that it be by God’s will; and if He wills for me to go, He will provide!”

Thinking about it made me feel weird, but for some or other reason from that day on, I stuck to my guns and never looked back to questioned it. “God, here is a chance to reveal yourself to me, a chance for you to build faith in my life,” was among my thoughts, and maybe to some degree a challenge to God, ‘Let’s see what you can do, I’ll take the initiative to apply and see what comes of it, besides there is nothing to lose if I don’t get accepted.’
Looking back now, I am completely sure that Seamill Scotland is where God wants me…

YWAM Scotland: Beautiful Feet (A short but powerful video clip)Alternative link https://www.facebook.com/ywamscotland/videos/10155521812471705/